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A Marriage Sermon
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Genre
Sermon
Date
1641
Full Title
A Marriage Sermon. A sermon called A Wife mistaken, or a Wife and no Wife: or Leah in stead of Rachel; A Sermon accused for Railing against Women; for maintaining Polygamie, many Wives, for calling Iacob a Hocus-Pocus. A Sermon laught at more than a Play by the Ignorant for many such mistakes: Justified by the Wife. Wisedome is Iustified of her Children. By Tho. Grantham M. Art. Curate of High Barnes neer London, Invenies aliquem
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Wing G1553
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Gen. 29. verse. 25. And it came to passe that in the morning behold it was Leah. And he said unto Laban, What is this thou hast done unto me? did not I serve with thee for Rachel? wherefore then hast thou beguiled mee?
In the text you may observe a Conjunctionand a division: a Conjunction, here are two
together that should be asunder, Iacob and
Leah. And in the morning behold it was Leah.
A division, heere are two asunder that should
be together, Iacob and Rachel: and first of the
Conjunction as fittest for this season, and opportunity;
you have seene the quality of this conjunction, it was an ill
Conjunction, a great deale of deceit in it, and where is there
a Conjunction, a Marriage, but there is deceit in it, and
least this deceit should cause a separation, the Church
bindeth them together before God and man, for better for
worse, for richer for poorer. And unlesse this course were
taken, how soone would there be a partition, their qualities
being almost as different as heaven and hell, as the good
Angels and the bad. Nabal and Abigail, Nabal a fool and
churle, and of so base a disposition, such a man of Belial,
that his own servants said a man could not tell how to speak
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to him: and she a kinde complementall woman, she fell atDavids feet, and offered to wash the feet of his servants. David
and Michal, Michal a scoffing woman, deriding David
for dancing before the Arke, and he a man after Gods own
heart; Socrates with Xantippe, she is like a Quotidian Ague,
or at the best she is like Sauls evill spirit that comes too
often upon him. Moses and Zipporah, she a terrible firie
woman, Thou art a bloudy husband to me, saith she, and Moses
the meekest man above all the men of the earth. The learned
distinguish a fourfold deceit in Marriage, the first is
error personæ, when Leah is given in stead of Rachel, one
party for another, as to Iacob, and this mistake doth hinder
and nullifie Mariage: for in Mariage there is a mutuall love
and consent One to another, but this is not where Leah is
given in stead of Rachel, and therefore no Mariage. But will
some say, is it possible that Iacob who was so subtill a man
should be so deceived, he was noted for a supplanter by
his Brother Esau; Is he not rightly called Iacob, for he hath
supplanted me these two times of my birthright and blessing.
He was so grave, so arch a supplanter, that he could
deceive his father although his voyce betraied him, and although
his father told him it was the voyce of Iacob, yet he
pressed him to blesse him in stead of his brother Esau. We
say that man is an excellent Hocus-Pocus, excellent in legerdemaine,
and slight of hand that can deceive one that looks
upon him. But he that can deceive the hearing, and the
feeling, he is far more excellent: my sight may be deceived
for I may take that which is Pictured to be lively and
real, but my hearing, my feeling cannot be so easily deceiv'd.
Thomas would not beleeve his seeing, his hearing, but when
he came to feeling to lay his hand in our Saviours side, then
he cried out, My Lord and my God. And now I suppose you
are ready to ask, how this Subtil man was deceived? The deceit
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was thus, solem olim sponsa obvelata facie traduci ad torummortalem pudoris causa. In those dayes the Brides came veiled
and Masked to their Marriage Beds, for modesty sake, and
it was a signe of Modesty to be silent. And thus much for the
first deceit, which is error personæ, a mistake of the person,
as this text represents to you. There is another deceit, which
is error qualitatis, when a man takes as he thinkes he hath,
one thrifty honest, faire, and she proves a painted whorish,
liquorish slut. And this deceit is generall, for many women
shew like the Egyptian Temples, very beautifull without
and built, and adorned with precious stones, saith, Lucian,
but if you seek what god they worship within, you shall
finde him to be a Cat, or a Goat, or an Ape, or some such
ridiculous ill favoured creature: so, many women, although
they be faire and beautifull without, are full of many vanities,
fickle, unconstant, lascivious affections: many a man
thinks he hath a saint, when he hath a Devill, a faire woman,
when she is a painted plaistered faced Iesabel; I will
not speak of these painted tombes and sepulchres, beautifull
without, but loathsome within, these Apples of Sodom,
that seeme faire to the sight but at the least touch they fall
to dust: so the least approaching discovers the corruption
of these creatures, so great is their corruption it corrupts
the sweetest perfumes, and makes them loathsome as themselves:
but I will not rake any longer in this unsavory dunghill.
There are two other errours, or deceits in Marriage, as
error Conditionis, and error fortunæ: but I let them passe, for
feare I should run into the errour of being tedious to this
assembly. I come now to the division, or separation; there is
discovery of an ill Conjunction, therefore I will cast my
meditations a little upon this appearance, or discovery of
this Conjunction, In the morning behold it was Leah. There
is many a man sleeps with Leah and thinks it is Rachel, there
is many a man so blinded in his love & affection that he is as
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much or more mistaken in the qualities of his wife thenIacob was in the person of Leah: many a man thinks he hath
a wife that loves him, when she cares not for him, and hee
may think that she is sighing and sorrowing in his absence,
when she is Revelling and Dancing. You may read Pro.
7.18. there's a woman speaks to a man in her husbands absence
to take his fill of love with her: he may be thinks, she
is weeping in his absence, when she is tumbling in her
perfumed bed, as you may read there, verse 17. I have perfumed
my bed with Myrrhe, Aloes and Cynamon; I have decked
it with coverings of tapestry, and fine linnen of Egypt: no
question this woman embraces her husband when he comes
home, and he discovers nothing: for the way of an whorish
woman, as Solomon saith is like the flight of a Bird in the
aire, like the passage of a ship upon the sea, like a serpent creeping
into a rocke: no signe of the birds flying, of the serpents
creeping, of the ships passage.
Look upon Ioseph's Mistresse, she hath his coat to shew
for honesty, Ecce signum, Behold the coat of this Hebrew: did
Sampson thinke those hands would have clipped his lockes,
that had so often embraced his body? Some rash men do
maintain, that the reason why men thinke there are so many
good women, is, because they are so blinde and ignorant
themselves; if they had but the eyes of the Wise, to see with
Solomons eyes, may be they would say, There was not one
good of a thousand, and he had told them one by one. And
how does Solomon define a good woman? just as the Philosopher
does, Vacuum ex supposito quod detur; if there be a Vacuum, it is Locus non repletus corpore; if there be, or shall
ever be such a thing in the world as a good woman, then she
is this and that, she is like a merchants Ship that bringeth
her food from far: and what of greater value ! she is like to
precious jewels, she is like to them, but there is none like
to her, none of equal value with her. Solomon saith, She is a
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crowne to her husband, she is the glory of her husband, saithSaint Paul, the very skarlet she cloathes her servants in does
shew her honourable, God himselfe cals her an helper, and
such a helper she is, that man could not have been capable
of that blessing, Increase and multiply, without her, then it
was The Seed of the woman that brake the Serpents head: she
was Deipora, she brought forth a God, and here I will be
bold to say out of the due honour to that Sexe, that there
have been women have deserved these praises of Solomon:
What was that Ester? that Cherubin of the Church under
whose wings it was safe: the Papists call the Virgin Mary,
Regina Cli, Queen of Heaven, and they pray to her to
command our Saviour, Mater impera Filio, Mother command
thy Son; She hath more Churches dedicated to her
than our Saviour, than all the Trinity, although she paid
her Fine in milke, but He in blood, as a great Divine
saith. How happy hath this Kingdom been under a Queen,
there are many eyes now living that have seen it, and not a
man but knowes it; I need not instance in particulars the
elect Lady and her sister, to whom Saint Iohn writ, Priscilla
able to informe a learned man Apollos in the Scripture:
these women were highly honoured by that Apostle called
from Heaven, Greete Priscilla and Aquila Rom. 16.3. Aquila
and Priscilla salute you. 1. Cor. 16.19. salute Priscilla and Aquila
2. Tim.4.19. Priscilla went with him into Syria Act. 18.18.
and thus much for the discovery, how long may a man sleep
before he knowes with whom, or what she is he sleeps withall,
before he knows whether it be Leah or Rachel. I am
come now to the division or separation, and you see it is
a high and great division, Iacob begins to word it, to fall to
termes with Laban who was his Master What is this thou
hast done unto me; did not I serve with thee for Rachel?
wherefore then hast thou beguiled me? And indeed the inconveniences
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were very many that befell Iacob by this wickedact of Laban: first of all he made his daughter a whore,
and a whore is odious to the children of God, she was either
to be burnt, or to be stoned. Then the wrong done to Rachel,
being deceived of her expectation, was enough to make her
weepe her selfe blear ey'd like Leah, then he brought an inconvenience
upon Iacob, having more wives then one, some
say it was a sin, some hold it a great Inconvenience to have
one, therefore much more to have two.
The married man is intangled like a fish in a net; he
comes merrily in, but he is mightily perplext when he cannot
get out: then this action of Laban was enough to set the
sisters at variance, and what joy could Iacob have when his
wives were devided, it was enough to devide his heart: then
the desire of rule, and jealousies, and distrusts that one hath
of the other; then the charges to maintaine two, whereas
Iacob if he had had but one, he would never have sought
further: God made but one for Adam, and Lamech was the
first that had two Wives, and he had no more then two, and
he was of the posterity of Cain, and condemned by the fathers:
and from Adam to Abraham, none of the posterity
of Seth had more then one wife that we read of they
two shall be one flesh, and how can that be if a man have
many wives. God made onely male and female, and he took
but one rib, and made of one rib, One Woman, not many.
I will not say, it was a sinne to have many wives, for I finde
it in the Law, Deut. 21. 15. If a man have two wives, one
that he loveth, and another that he hateth and there the Law
speakes of both their sons as legitimate, Deut. 17.17. the
Law does forbid the King to have many wives which may
draw away his minde, and Saint Augustine upon that
place saith, permissum & Regi habere plures uxores non
plurimas, he may have more then one or two, but not many,
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and Iehoiada that was a most holy Priest, took two wives,for King Ioash, 2.Chron. 24.3. but me thinks I hear some
say, Laban is unjustly condemned for dealing so strictly with
Iacob: was it not a great kindnesse in Laban to take Iacob, Iacob
that had cosined his Father, his Brother, and to trust him
with his flock? And then it was a kindnesse that he gave him
his daughter, and for ought I know the better of the two, the
fairest is not alwaies the best, Beautifull Rachel sold Iacob
for Mandrakes, whereas blear eyed Leah bought him and
went out to meet him, Gen. 30.16. Tender eyed Leah will
be weeping at my misfortunes, when beautifull Rachel will
be laughing with another: Abraham went in danger with
beautiful Sarah, but Iacob liveth secure with tender eyed
Leah, Rachel stole her fathers gods, and could see her Father
and husband quarrel the while, when Leah was continually
weeping, Rachel will be impatient if she have not what she
desires, give me Children or else I dye: and what is beauty
with such disquietnesse, but like a faire house haunted with
sprites, or a bed of violets with a serpent. But look upon
Leah she is more moderate, tender eyed, she will be weeping
in stead of scoulding, Rachel will be subject to be wandering
like Dina, Leah is tender eyed, and the winde will
hurt her, veniunt spectantur ut Ipse
, they delight to be looked
upon, what are these many fancies in their dressings but so
many signes to invite a man to Inne there if he please,
whereas the Passenger else had gone on his way, what does
the fowler whistle for but to catch the Bird, and such is the
end of their enchantments. Thus you see the danger of
beauty, there is more danger in it then in the most unruly
Elements, the fire hath no power of a man if he do not touch
it; nor the water; but if a man look but upon beauty, it will
endanger him, and it is kept with a great deale of danger and
care, as the Apples of the Hesperides with a watchfull Dragon.
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But will some say, why doe you maintaine bleare eyedLeah against beautifull Rachel, Leahs fault was great in lying
with Iacob. To this I answer, fornication was held no sin
amongst the Gentiles, and the Church of Rome holds, fornicationem
non vagam, that if a man keep constantly to one
woman it is no sinne: and heer let no man be harsh against
Leah, for she is tender eyed, and can weep teares enough to
wash away her sin, tears enough to wash our Saviours feet,
alas, be not harsh against her, she is blear eyed already & too
much weeping will make her blinde, what if Leah have a
blemish in the eye of her body, yet her understanding, the eye
of her soule may be cleare, and beautifull, and if men consider
rightly, the greatest deformity and blemish in a woman
is, to be bleare eyed in her understanding, to mistake a
mans actions, not to see them clearly, if her husband be sociable,
then he is given to drunkennes, if silent, then he hath no
discourse in him, if merry, not that gravity that becomes
him, if he put not himselfe upon hard adventures to raise
his fortunes, she is disquieted, and if he doe, and be foyled,
then she contemnes him; give me the eye of the understanding,
let the other eye be as cleare as Christal, if this be
blemisht there is no joy. For ought I know, this Laban, this
Idolater, shall rise up against many Christians: how usuall is
it, for many a man to make faire promises, to promise a man
Rachel, he shall have this and that, and any thing his heart
can desire if he will serve them, but when a man hath done
all he can, they will put Leah upon him, some bleare eyed
unhandsome thing, upon which so soon as a man can but
look, he shall finde it to be Leah, it's plaine enough to bee
seen, behold it was Leah, it is a hard thing for a man to get
a Rachel of his Master, to get any thing that hath any delight
or pleasure in it, great men will not part with their Rachels.
And still I say, this Laban had more honesty and
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goodnes then many a Christian, for although he had doneIacob a little wrong, yet he had so much mildnes, and Gentlenes,
and Gentility, as he did suffer Iacob to speak to him
and to tell him of it, why hast thou beguiled me thus. Now
there are rich men, if they have done a man a displeasure,
will not be told of it. Nay if a poore man trust a rich man
with money, if he be not disposed to give it, or is unwilling,
will be angry if the poore man ask it, and doe him all the
mischiefe that may be, and what is this but like theeves that
doe not onely rob a man, but binde a man too, and gag him
that he shall not speak, or like Rogues that murther a man
because they shall not betray them; God send me to deale
with Laban, with an Idolater, I shall finde a man that I dare
speak to, I shall find a mate that will give me Leah, that will
give me something and cosin me of all.
God complained of his vinyard, that when he had taken
a great deal of pains with it, it brought forth wilde grapes,
ecce Labruscus, behold wilde grapes plaine enough to be seen.
And heer if I should shew to the world with an Ecce, the
wilde grapes, the Basest actions of men, I make no question
but men would passe the same judgement that David did
upon the rich man that tooke the poor mans Lambe. And
heer let every man be exhorted not to deceive his servant
or his kinsman or his friend, Iacob for deceiving his brother
& his Father, was paid in his own Coyn, & enjoyed not the
blessing twenty yeers after: Laban deceived him in his wife,
Laban for deceiving Iacob, was deceived by Iacob, with the
rods he laid. Rachel stole Labans gods for deceiving her of
her husband at first. Iacob deceived his Father with Goats
skins, and he himselfe was deceived with the blood of a
Goat. David cut off the lap of Sauls coat, and his clothes
would not keep him warme in his old age. Sampsons eye
lusted after a Philistine, and Sampsons eye was put out, Ieroboams
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hand reached to the Prophet, and that hand withered,Thus you see how God punisheth sin in the same act, in the
same part, in the same kinde. Time will not give me leave
heer to shew you how many a man sleeps with Leah, with
some ugly deformed sin, and being blinded in sin and darknesse,
thinks it is Rachel, very beautifull and loves it entirely,
till the morning light of Gods grace arise, and then
he sees the deformity of his sin, how bleare eyed it is, how
ill-favoured, and now let every man consider how we are all
servants to God, and we serve him for Rachel, for some pleasant
thing we delight in, as the Apostles dream't of a Kingdome,
if it please God to give us Leah, in stead of Rachel, to
give us that which pleaseth us not so well, let us be content
with it and serve him on still, he will at the last give us Rachel,
we shall be married to him in whom are all joys, such
as eye hath not seen, nor eare heard, neither hath it entered
into the heart of man to conceive. To which God of his mercy
bring us: to God the Father, God the Sonne, and God
the Holy Ghost be all honour, &c.